Wednesday, 31 December 2014

BEING SENSITIVE....PART TWO



Sensitivity is an issue which has different connotations, interpretation and different understanding. I believe people's background and experiences also affect their level of sensitivity. being sensitive to me means I understand the other person's needs and therefore act accordingly to ensure my actions are in due consideration to that person's needs. Also being sensitive could  mean you react delicately and more personal to different issues.  I see sensitivity as a good aspect of any human because you tend to  understand people a lot easier, care for both their immediate needs which are either emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually. You put yourself in people's shoes, and the tendency to judge them only based on your own mindset diminishes. I think I'd rather be a sensitive person than not. 

A lot of people may think that being sensitive makes you prone to hurt, pain and disappointments. But I strongly believe being sensitive makes you more accommodating, loving and everything else not being sensitive doesn't represent. Have you being in a situation where the sensitive part of you helped you make the right decision whether personal or not? 
Have you also being in a situation where you wished you didn't allow sensitivity to take the better part of you?
How enlightening It will be to learn from each other's experiences!

Tuesday, 30 December 2014

BEING SENSITIVE.. PART ONE



Being Sensitive is when one is able to detect or respond to slight changes physically or emotionally (even when the change is not obvious to many). These changes could be in your relationship with your spouse, family members, friends, colleagues, environment or anywhere you find yourself. No matter the negative side of being sensitive, the advantage supersedes the negatives. Being sensitive, you are able to understand the feelings of others and aware of their needs, and by so, you will behave in a way that will make them feel good rather than hurting them. The world is filled with insensitive people, that is why a friend could comfortably step on a friend's toe without filling a pinch about how the other feels, or you hear of a man cheating on his wife and do not feel that he is doing the wrong thing, or a business colleague cheating his/her partner...the list goes on. If the world could be half as sensitive, it would be a better place for us all trust me. 

For Instance, when a couple is genuinely sensitive about each others needs, they will strive not to hurt each others feelings by steering clear off anything that will hurt the feelings of the other. The rate at which couples go their separate ways is as a  result of insensitivity. If you are sensitive, you will notice when your partner is feeling down, you will not say words that will hurt your partners feelings, you will treat your partner with love and respect. Someone ones said, "Sensitive men are better lovers, better husbands, better fathers" and I have come to agree with that.

THE ENDLESS NEED FOR MATURITY



Maturity is important for everyday living. Dealing with life issues involve high level of maturity. It is not as simple as ABC but it can also be as simple as ABC. When you approach life issues with maturity, you are more in control and the very things that seem complex and stressful become as easy as you make them to be. From your relationship with your husband, to your relationships with members of your family and extended  ones, even to your relationship with your colleagues at work and friends, and life in general, approaching all of these with maturity can never be over emphasised. You enjoy more peace while you over look those things that can potentially get in the way of your peace and happiness, as well as develop a better reasoning/ acumen to see things through the Eyes of others. 

With maturity also comes due consideration for others. You also learn to ignore a lot of negative signals purposefully put in place to cause aggravation.   We can go on and on...  
Why not share some of your own     discoveries and experiences on maturity and how it has affected your own life as an individual?

Monday, 29 December 2014

PREPARATION IS IMPORTANT WHEN A NEW THING IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN



Change as often as it occurs in our lives remains a constant irrespective of our readiness to embrace that kind of change at that time in our lives. 
Most often than not, the changes tend to impose themselves on us by creating life circumstances that we are not ready to deal with. 
However,  changes do happen and our state of mind goes a long way to determine how we respond or react to the new things that spring up as outcome of changes we are faced with. 

When preparation meets an opportunity,  there is a high tendency that success will be inevitable. In the same spirit,  it is always very important to expect and get ready for changes. Let me help you understand. Most people find  it hard to deal with expected or unexpected changes because they have not resolved the conflict between change and stagnation. They enjoy the routine, they do not adjust the itinerary,  the children attend the same school from start to finish,  same pattern of breakfast, same style of expressing affection...They continue with the old ways of doing things because they think the change will distort the already familiar process or simply complicate the process. This mindset naturally hinders the positive vibes that the change should bring because the primary receptor of the goodwill has a flawed perception. As  we are willing to embrace changes,  we expand our horizon and acquire more knowledge.  

Although we might not be completely aware of the activities before us that will most likely bring changes in our lives, it is important that we prepare for the ones we anticipate.  Preparing for changes will help us see the grey areas and make necessary adjustment that will help us manage the changes in a more mature and diplomatic way.  

IBINABO'S HUSBAND TALKS ABOUT WHY HE LOVES HER


Ibinabo Fiberesima is the president of Actors' Guild of Nigeria. Read below an excerpt of the interview by City People Magazine



"The best is that she is easily the kindest person I know and one thing we have in common is that we both love children a lot. One of my dreams someday is to open up an orphanage and I already see her ding a lot of things I would love to do. She is an easy person to love, she is very dedicated and loyal. Something a lot of people don't know about Ibinabo is that she is a very good cook. the best cook I have ever met. My kids love her absolutely and her kids love me too. It's not something that happened by accident. I think this is just the right time and I couldn't have asked for a better wife" he told City People magazine. Continue...

On how he copes with the negative stories about his wife in the media, he said

"It is very easy for blogs or people to sit behind their computers and write things about somebody you don't know anything about. She is just a face you see on T.V or paper to many people. Nobody knows her real story. A lot of people just write what they want. I have known her since we were like 17,18 so nobody out there can tell me who IB is. Nobody can define her for me. I am a strong man so I know who wears the pants. At the same time I am not going to disrespect my wife. She is extremely submissive and if I could design a wife for myself, I couldn't have gotten it any better. She is my best friend. We think alike and we share the same goal. For both f us, its not about what we can take out of life but what we can give"he said.


A PART OF ALL YOU EARN IS YOURS TO KEEP



Arkad relates that he did as advised, saving a tenth of his income for a year, then investing that money with a brick maker who went on a journey to buy jewels to trade. He related this to Algamish, who castigated Arkad for his foolishness. "Every fool must learn" he said, "But why trust the knowledge of a brick maker about jewels? Would you go to a bread maker to inquire about stars? 
Algamish then said, "He who takes advise about his savings from one who is inexperienced in such matters will pay with his savings for proving the falsity of their opinions. " Arkad then saved his money for another year, and he invested with Agger the shield maker who used it to buy materials; every fourth month Agger paid Arkad rent for the use of these funds. 

Arkad spent these dividends on fine clothing and regular scheduled feasts. Algamish comments that Arkad is "eating the children of his savings" by not investing them. Arkad adjusted his behaviour and when he finally meets with Algamish two years later, Algamish is so pleased with how Arkad had taken his lessons to heart, he hired Arkad as a manager of his estate in Nippur. 

By continuing to save and invest wisely, Arkad relates that he became the wealthy man that he is now. 

Excerpts fro the book titled "The richest man in Babylon.

Sunday, 28 December 2014

QUOTES FOR THE WEEK



This week I have a few quotes that might help you in dealing with whatever challenge you are going through right now. The good thing about these quotes is that they were birthed out of life challenging situations, experiences, whether positive or negative, which makes it easier to relate it to real life experiences. Find below some of these quotes:

Sometimes people come into your life for a moment, a day, or a life time. It does not matter how long they spent with you, but how they impacted your life in that time.

You cannot control how people will treat you or what they say about you. But you can control how you react to it.

Be a warrior, not a worrier.

The strongest people are not those who show strength in front of us, but those who have fought and won battles we knew not.

GOD is the only rewarder of good works. 

It is better to tell the truth that hurts, than to tell that lies that soothes.

Waiting time is very difficult and challenging. But also a time of learning and gathering experience.

Give your time to love and you will get the reward thereof.

Do not assume you are smart..someone out there is smarter. Be sincere.

Do not disappoint those that hold you in high esteem. People will always remember the wrong you did more.

Giving is a virtue..

There is no situation that prayers cannot solve. Just ask. It is that simple.

Whatever you need, you have to seed it first.

Refuse to settle for the less or be someone's spare time.

Love yourself and treat yourself kindly. By so, you will know when someone is not loving or treating you right.

Always appreciate those that love and care about them. It is a privilege.

Be kind to your spouse. Treat your spouse with love and respect.

Majority of the quotes are from yours truly..

Have a splendid week..




















Saturday, 27 December 2014

WHY PARENTS NEED TO BE FIRM



To be a parent(s), you must have made up your mind to stand up for your right as a parent. A lot of people will want to tell you how you have not been a good parent because of their own ideology of parenting. An adage says, "all the five fingers are not the same". This means that we are all unique, likewise our children. You do not expect your elder child to have the same temperament as your second or last child. You must ensure that you have made up your mind to be a strong parent(s), who understands that raising up a child or children is a life time investment, and as such, needs your devoting your time, energy, enthusiasm, wisdom, and above all prayers into the life of your child(ren). From my research, here are a few of my findings why parents need to be firm while raising their children:


Emotional Stability: When parents are emotionally stable, they will be able to understand the state of their children. They will be able to decipher by a mere look at the child if the he or she is okay or not. Being emotionally stable is being able to be in control of your negative feelings or circumstances. You need not to always let your children see you cry all the time, you will end of raising children who are emotionally deranged. You do not want to raise children who are less confident of themselves. When your children see you cry, they will feel helpless and defenceless. You are supposed to be their hero as they look up to you at all times. Do not fail them by always letting them see you cry or scream or shout or curse. Learn to control your emotion as parents, by so doing, you will raise children who are stable emotionally.


Balance your friendship and your discipline: Your children will be free to open up to you when they know that there is a certain level of friendship that exists between them and you, their parents. You will know exactly what is going on in their lives. They will trust you enough to let you in about their feelings and more. But, it is very important to let your children know who is in charge. Do not become too lose with your children that you cannot even say a simple "no" to them just because that "bridge" between you and your children have been closed, so they do not recognise you as parents, rather they see you as pals. Be friends with your children and at the same time, be firm. Let your children know that there is a thin line between you as their caring, loving, understanding, playful parent and a strict parent who will not turn a blind eye to a certain negative behaviour.


Earn a living: Children are gifts from GOD and as such deserve to be given the best. As parents, since we took it upon ourselves to bring in a child or children into the world, we must ensure that we have something doing to earn a living to be able to take care of our children. Do not let your children become vulnerable because their parents could not provide for them. There is no such confidence than when a child knows that his/her parents are capable of providing the basic needs for them; such as, a good education, a good living and learning environment, text books, etc. Children do not need much to be excited or comfortable, you only need to let them know that they can rely on you. You do not need to be the wealthiest person on earth to be able to give your children a comfortable upbringing. All you need is to have something that earns you a living and most importantly, being able to save for the rainy day.


Wisdom: The scripture says anyone who is need of wisdom should come ask. It takes great wisdom to be firm as parents while raising your children. This is very important because wisdom is profitable to direct. As parents, all we need to achieve our goals of raising godly children is wisdom in all that we do. Let us ask GOD for wisdom to be able to handle each unique child the way that will help them a d not break them. With wisdom, you will find out that parenting can be as easy as you want it to be. With wisdom, you will be able to find a ways to solve some seemingly difficult situations regarding your children.




LIVING ABOVE COMPLAIN



To complain is to utter expressions of grief or lament, censure or resentment, to mumur or to find fault. To complain is to let a problem dominate your conversation as a person, to criticize, to groan, to nag, to whine...

The Bible tells us to do all things without complaining or disputing. If you are not careful, you will live life complaining and nagging about everything due to the pressure that comes from the environment. When you live your life that way you will get results that you never bargained for. God's prescription is for you to live life above complaining because it hinders your expected fulfilment in life. 

The Israelites, as they journeyed from Egypt through the wilderness they continuously complained over one issue or the other. Constant complaints reveals your level of immaturity and blinds you from seeing the opportunities that you should explore because every life challenge is a design to make you a better person. 

Our Life: Many complain about various aspects of life or their circumstances. People complain about everything...rain, sun, cold, hot weather, traffic, baby boy, baby girl...everything. Remember, life will get better when you change your disposition and stay positive.
Our Lover: It's amazing that lots of married people complain about their relationships and spouses. Some complain about their children. Yet those you are complaining to are just praying for a little of the good things you have received in your life. A faulty marriage is the surest way to a miserable life. Brace up and work out your marriage. 

Our Labour: When you accept a job, God expects you to give it your very best. When you complain, it reveals the flaw in your character. A job you prayed and fasted for, now you are no longer thrilled by it. When you stop complaining, you take away the siege of darkness over your life and guess what...you start shinning, you start glowing because you understand the power of gratitude, expectation, and faith.

Please quit complaining....and start shinning....

Friday, 26 December 2014

THE GREAT LEADERSHIP CHALLENGE



If you want to be a leader who attracts quality people, the key is to become a person of quality yourself. Leadership is the ability to attract someone to the gifts, services, skills and opportunities you offer as an owner, manager, or as a parent. 
What's important in leadership is refining your skills. 

All great leaders keep working on themselves until they become effective. Here are some specifics...

Learn to be firm but not impolite. It's an extra step you have to take to become a powerful capable leader with a wide range of reach. Some people mistake rudeness for strength...it's not even a good substitute. 

Learn to be kind but not weak. We must not mistake kindness for weakness. Kindness is certainly not an act of weakness. Be kind enough to tell someone the truth, be considerate enough to lay it on the line and not deal in delusion. 

Learn to be bold but not a bully. It takes boldness to win the day. To build your influence, you have to walk in front of your group. You have to be willing to take the first arrow, tackle the first problem, discover the first sign of trouble. Like the farmer, if you want any reward at harvest time you have to be bold to face the weeds, rain, sun, storm and all the challenges that comes with that field of endeavour. 

Learn to be humble but not timid. You can't be an inspiring leader by being timid. Don't by any means mistake timidity for humility. Humility is a virtue while timidity is an affliction.

INFLUENCE - A SOFT FORM OF POWER



Influence is a means of getting what we want without command or compulsion. Unlike power, which can be exercised only by certain people in the work environment such as managers and executives by virtue of their position, influence can be exercised by anyone at any level of the organisation. For example, a savvy manager who enjoys the power of position sees the wisdom of not exercising it. She recognizes that she can get more of what she wants by applying influence. Explaining her concerns by asking for cooperation to meet departmental needs will be more effective than bossing people around and oppressing them with your position.

Influence based leadership is a powerful approach that has helped salvage relationships and work ethics that were almost falling apart. The approach to life circumstances determines the possible outcome.

TRUSTWORTHINESS AS A FOUNDATION FOR INFLUENCE:
It's obvious that a person considered untrustworthy will have a hard time influencing the decision.

Here are some tips that will help guide your decisions towards the path way of gaining genuine trust from folks:

Tell people the truth, no matter how painful.

Deliver both the good news and the unappealing news clearly without unspoken undertone.

Accept your mistakes and take responsibility for them.

Identify the upside and downside potential of your suggestions.

Recognise the value of ideas that compete with yours.

Do not ignore calls from people you are owing, whether financial or services, pick up, explain the circumstance and offer genuine reassurance.

Provide decision makers with the information they need to make wise choices.

Put organizational goals above your personal motives.

The cumulative effect of these behaviours over time invest a person with trustworthiness that sets the stage for influence to happen. We are learning everyday. Let us strive for excellence by influencing our world positively. 

Thursday, 25 December 2014

WISHING YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS





This is wishing all my readers a Merry Christmas. I believe you all know the reason we celebrate Christmas. Just in case some do not, I would like to throw more light on it so you will have an understanding of the meaning of our celebration. 


JESUS is the reason for the season of Christmas. This is because of GODs' unconditional love towards us all. As the scriptures say in John 3;16 ' For GOD so love the world that HE gave HIS only begotten son, that whosoever believes in HIM shall not perish, but have everlasting life". JESUS is our banner of love. HE is the essence of our Christianity- our salvation. It will give HIM so much joy that you have a clear understanding why HE accepted to come into this world. It is because HE loves us. HE wants us to carry this love along with us and share it in ways that will glorify HIM. It is no coincidence that Christmas is a special period where every where is lively and colourful, people are happy and excited and also the at least 2 whole restful weeks. It shows you the thought of our LORD JESUS towards us. It pleases HIM that we enjoy life to the full. HE does not want us to struggle. HE wants us all to receive all that pertains to life and godliness. HE wants our life to be filled with love, excitements and celebration. HE wants us to share love and also give, because giving is a true sign of love from our Heavenly FATHER. 


So, in a nut shell, go all out there today with this conviction that you are so loved by our GOD. Let nothing take away this conviction. Let your heart be filled with love. Share your gifts to your families, friends, the needy, the motherless babies and anyone who needs help. Do not eat alone. Do not expect to only receive. Also give. Because it is better to give than to receive, so the scriptures say. Have a wonderful Christmas. And may you have an understanding of your celebration. JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON. Let us show some love...

Wednesday, 24 December 2014

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR MAN LOVES TO HEAR YOU SAY?



Hey Ladies.... I would love to share with you some real good stuff I got from my research. As much as we love to hear our men say sweet words to us, they are also moved by what we say to them as well. Though most men are expressionless unlike women, we show our emotions, just the way we feel, men are more of actions. Men are human beings and as such they love to hear you compliment them for a "job well done" like:


I am proud of you:

Because your man is always out there working to ensure that his family is comfortable, give him some kudos by telling him that. He will be so pleased to do more knowing that someone as special as you sees his efforts and appreciates them. Do not just act like that is his duty to fend for his family, after all, there are men out there, who do not even care about how their family are fairing. So, boost his ego and appreciate him by telling him how proud of him you are. You will see him in action.

I love the way you take care of me:

If your man takes good care of you and makes you feel like a queen, do not hesitate to let him know that. Men who take good care of their women would like to hear such compliment coming from the woman. It gives them the satisfaction that they are doing a great job because your welfare is of utmost concern to him.

I love your strength:

Men love it when they notice that their women see them as their hero or champion. So many times I have told my husband this and I see him want to protect me at all times. You do not want your man to feel less or have a glimpse that you see him less, that will kill his soul especially if he is the one that loves you and goes all out for you. Appreciate his strength whenever he does some stuff for you and also when you are intimate. Let your man hear you say you love his strength, you will see he will become your "knight in shinning armour".

The magic word "Thank You":

This is a compliment that we all love to hear. How do you feel when your kind gesture is returned with a heart warming thank you? Your answer is as good as mine. Given another opportunity, you would want to do more. That is the way our men feel when they hear us appreciate their love, care, kind gestures, protection, affection with the magic word, thank you. Some women feel that it is their mens' duty, but the truth is that your man might be longing to hear you at least thank him for that kind affection. Because of the mens' busy nature, they are not always around to help us out with some chores, but whenever he makes out time to wash the dishes, thank him for helping you out. He will do more next time given another opportunity.

You look good:

We feel on top of the world when our men tell us how good we look after dressing up for work or to an event. I love to hear my husband tell me those lovely words like , "baby you're beautiful, I love what you are wearing, even though I know. But hearing that from him  boosts my confidence and makes me feel on top of the world, knowing that the most important person in my life has admired and appreciated me. That is how our men feel also. Admire the things you love about your....his dressing, his looks, his disposition, etc. He will always strive not to disappoint you.



WHY YOU NEED TO LEARN TO MANAGE STRESS.....PART ONE



Stress is the way humans react both physically and mentally to changes, events and situations in their lives. People experience stress differently, but the reaction is based on your perception of an event or situation.


It is often said that stress is a fact of life. Wherever you are and whatever you are doing, you might not be able to completely avoid stress but one thing I know you can do is to manage it, put it under your control to avoid the reverse which does not go down well.


Changes in our lives-such as going to college, changing job, adjusting to a new environment, keeping up with child care and school run, preparing for a big event, moving into a new apartment can really be stressful. Most of the time, these frequent causes of stress are sourced from meaningful activities we have long anticipated for. 


The first step in managing stress is to know yourself and carefully consider the activities that stress you out. Learning to do this takes time, and although you cannot avoid stress in totality, the good news is that you can minimize the harmful effects of stress such as depression or hypertension. 


Fundamental key is to develop an awareness of how you interpret, respond, react to circumstances. Being aware of this deep part of you will help you develop coping strategies or techniques for managing stress.

Tuesday, 23 December 2014

THE POWER OF RELATIONSHIPS




Relationship is a condition of being connected or related. We were created to connect and do life together with people. God said "I will make him a helper..." This word "helper" doesn't imply a house help doing chores, but a person that connects with you in the journey of fulfilling your assignment. Man was never designed to be alone or isolated; man is designed for community, connection, and relationships. 

Living without meaningful relationships is unhealthy and catastrophic. The fact that some folks have experienced bad and hurtful relationships doesn't validate a decision never to connect or relate to others again. 
Today's social media era of facebook, twitting, and other social media platforms have twisted the effect of connecting so much that you might be hooked up on all the networks and yet experience a vacuum created by deep loneliness. 


Key Facts About Relationships

God First: 

Fundamental, deep, meaningful relationship starts with God. Man was made to relate with God first and then with others. That order of priority sets in motion life circumstances that bring fulfilment from relating with other people because wisdom and uncommon amplitude is available. 


Determines the outcome of your life: 

The connections we make with people plays a key role in the outcome of our lives, future and destiny. Certain schools of thought will encourage you to choose your friends which is ideal, but I encourage you to prayerfully choose them such that the sharpening you will get will be in sync with your purpose.


A Blessing or a curse:

A lot of people have made connection with the wrong persons and it altered the cause of their lives which made them to go off tangent; while a lot of people cannot share their success adventure with you without mentioning key people that made inputs and contributed significantly to their growth and development. It becomes very interesting to know that at certain junctions of their lives, men, women, life circumstances were occastrated to help them...Powerful!!!  


It requires work: 

A successful relationship will cost you; a phone call may be all you need even when you're tired. It's a futile venture expecting your relationships to blossom without making efforts and sacrifices. Yes! Yes!! Yes!!! Most of the time you need to win trust from people, not because they don't want to trust you, it might just be that their experiences have in simple terms formed a perception in their minds. It might not be easy to follow through all of that, but as the spirit leads you, don't hesitate to offer that seemingly little help. Personally, I have seen little acts of kindness replicate themselves in multiple dimensions. 


Aspire to Inspiration: 

Develop  only relationships that correct, motivate, develop, and stairs up the verve to aspire to inspirations. Don't be sentimental about this because it will determine the turn out of your life.

Monday, 22 December 2014

WE CANNOT STOP LEARNING...



The more you learn and teach, the more you break limitations and create greater platforms for life improvement.... 

Learning is one attribute of great achievers. Due to the constant change of the human body and the environment, it becomes very necessary to constantly renew yourself by learning new ways of doing things which I call ‘’survival skill’’. 

Perceptions are formed as well as changed when you expose your mind to relevant information through learning and reading. The wider access to information you have, the more fine-tuned your perception will become. The life of continuous learning is one of the attributes and character of people who lead in different capacities because they understand that the moment they stop exposing their minds to updated information as the society and industry evolve, going obsolete will become a natural outcome of that intentional or unintentional  ignorance.  What this means, then, is that, if we are not constantly learning as we go about our day-to-day business, then each day we are getting further and further out of touch with the demands of the modern working world. 

Therefore as you experience your environment and all that comes with it, be willing to be taught as much as you are ready to share your thoughts, taking every step of enthusiasm to continually be on top of your game, learning and honing new skills that will in time distinguish you from the usual and above all, moving you closer and closer to fulfillment as you carry out your life task with diligence and tenacity of purpose.  It is also important to prioritise your learning to be in sync with your most anticipated outcomes, by so doing you have attached some level of value to the learning process.  It also involves making sure that we have, as far as possible, the knowledge and skills required to carry out our duties appropriately and filling any gaps in our knowledge base and skills repertoire as these become identified. Learning is very important as long as you are alive. know that nobody is above learning.  If you shut yourself out from learning, you have shut yourself out from knowing.

LET US TALK...MEN. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IS LEFT IN HER "LOVE BANK?"



Someone said "You cannot eat your cake and have it". This is so true. And I am relating this adage to couples right now. Ok let us talk. 

As a woman, I have come to know that women are very soft at heart although the experiences we have accumulated have given us a reason to toughen up and be rational even as we express love.
But the truth still remains, you can only get from a woman the measure investment you make on her either as a positive emotional deposit or a negative emotional deposit either ways, the return will come shaking together and running over..

It amazes me to know that  most men irrespective of class and societal variations aren't aware of one powerful "source document" in women..." love banks". In black and white, it means an archive where emotional deposits are harnessed such that adequate responses are given to each deposit as they accumulate.
Just the same way you deposit money into your bank account, you are very sure that you can always go to your bank and withdraw any amount you want as long as you have funds to match...however the effect of an empty bank account  is obvious. Even if you choose to live in the assumption of having sufficient funds, you will receive an error message. This is the same when it comes to a marriage relationship.

I would like to ask Men, how much of your wife's needs do you know?  Have you noticed that when women are very angry, it takes just little to get them out of that mood if the man knows exactly the right botton to press. Women only need tender loving care. In my opinion,  money is secondary.  After all, what is money without emotional satisfaction? 
So men, you need to know how much withdrawal you make from your wife's love bank. Women are givers by nature and men tend to take advantage of their giving  nature.

You do not expect to deposit a little and expect more love, support, affection,  trust etc from your wife. When you have not invested your sincerity, love, passion, time, understanding and all that is relevant  to a great marriage, and expect your wife to be all that for and to you.  If you eat all your cake, do not expect to have it. Men should be able to look right through their wives.  Women are strong supports and can and will give their all when they see that their husband have given their all in the marriage.

How often do you appreciate your wife, your help meet,your back bone? Remember that before you met her, you could hardly find your feet. Her presence in your life brought about your open doors. Can I get a witness. I have met a lot of men who tell me that immediately they met their wives, their lives took a great turn.

So our dear men, you have found a good thing, and have obtained favour from GOD just as the scriptures confirm. This good gift you have found can transcend to a better and the best gift ever in your life, only if you invest in making strong, timely, simple, relevant, needful deposits that will translate into great wealth for you.

Sunday, 21 December 2014

MORE ON REFLECTION



Disney was always dreaming of the future. What future dreams do you hold? Where. Do you see yourself five years from now? Do you ever take time out of your busy schedule to dream a little?


Disney's vision tended to shoot for the star, yet were based on reality. Are your expectations set high enough? Too high?


Don Schoendorfer had a long term vision that was broken into meaningful short-term goals. First one hundred chairs, then one hundred thousand chairs, then twenty million. Do you break your goals down into meaningful milestones-points of celebration?


Everyday happiness and fulfilment one day, one blossom at a time. What specifically can you do today that will help propel you toward achieving your vision tomorrow? It is time for reflection. 

Saturday, 20 December 2014

UNDER THE BUSHEL IS NOT YOUR PLACE OF EXPRESSION



"Work is love made visible, and if you cannot work with love, it is better that you leave your work and sit at the gate of the temple and take arms of those who work with joy. For if you bake bread with indifference, you bake a bitter bread that feeds but half of man’s hunger. And if you grudge the crushing of the grapes, your grudge distills a poison in the wine. For if you sing though as an angel and love not the singing, you muffle men’s ears with voices of the day and voices of the night. All work is empty save there is love- and when you work with love, you bind yourself to yourself, to one another, and to God". 
Kahlil, Gibran.
The Prophet. 


YES! Under the bushel is not your place of expression.  This understanding came alive in me when I was pondering on why there are so many lives wondering about without direction, focus, and purpose for living. In that very deep state of concern and refusal to be limited in my mind, rather to go all out in the pursuance of that which is ideal, I came to the conclusion, that conclusion which is born of a strong conviction that under the bushel is not my place of expression. I did lay hold of this understanding and it helped champion the cause of my life as it facilitated the production of this material for the perusal and benefit of society. There is more to life than routine people have become so comfortable with including the sleep and wake up cycle. More is expected from you than the normal routine which you are used to and have obviously become very comfortable with. When I became very convinced about the kind of life God has designed and fashioned for me to live, when I discovered my assignment and giftin's, when the essence and purpose for living was clear, something happened to me, I became very uncomfortable with sleeping for the number of hours I used to sleep- That uncomfortable state naturally changed my sleeping pattern and of course timing. 


The moment you gain clarity of purpose and have the grit to follow through, you will become very uncomfortable with so many things, so many things that you at one time or the other did see as nothing due to your perception and stereotyped paradigm- some friends will leave, new attitudes will spring up, concept and style will modify, your new understanding and direction will bring you in contact with some like-minded creatures, you will all of a sudden begin to make sense out of things you previously attached less importance to, the renewal of your mind forms new perceptions in your heart such that your sensitivity is ignited and you begin to see areas where your calling can provide solution to the needs of society. This is the point of significance and relevance because your abilities are not to be hidden under the bushel but to be fully expressed to the glory of God and for the benefit of the society.  As you horn and sharpen these abilities through problem solving and proffering solutions to the needs of your environment, your life becomes a metaphor for relevance, relevance which was designed for you to walk in even before the inception of your life. Your life has been designed for global significance and relevance which obviously doesn’t stop there; it continues and evolves as you commit yourself to discover your relevance in the state of things, because our lives are closely connected to the success of society, and the more we individually and collectively strengthen ourselves to become relevant, we will have a community of like-minds who are consumed with the passion to make a difference.

LET'S SHED SOME FATS




Happy weekend folks, hope you are having a great time. It's my healthy tips again and I am going to list out to you a few and common foods that can help you burn those fats you accumulated during the hectic week as a result of junks.

Below are some effective fat burning foods you can easily lay your hands on. Sorry I have no pictures,  but be rest assured that they are foods that you know very well, that was why I said they are common. Here we go:


Green Tea- This is my best any day any time. It is rich in antioxidant. Earlier in my post, I listed  to you why green tea is special and good to you. You can check it out.

Honey- And like Green Tea, Honey is also a good source of antioxidant.

Water-  My second best.  I take a lot of water and I must tell you, it is one of the easiest ways you can shed those fats.

Avocado Pear - If you have been reading my blog, you must have read a few of the benefits of Avocado.  in addition to its benefits, Avocado is good for weight loss.  I tried it and it works.

Lean Meat- They contain less fats. So you do not have to give up eating meat because you want to shed those fats.

Peanuts- I can tell you that peanut is very good if you want to shed those fats. A hand full of peanut will keep you full and you can hardly get hungry. They are also a good source of antioxidant. 

Whole-wheat bread- can help you shed those fats even though they contain high carbohydrates. They are rich in nutrients and fibre which can sustain you for a period of hours and you will not "think food". 

This is from yours truly... Trust me, it works for me a great deal. I need to look good and keep fit even as a mother. So, you can try out my healthy tips this weekend and you will be glad you did.




YOU ARE MORE THAN



This is to that someone.......


Who is battling with past mistakes


Who has lost hope completely because your society has condemned you


Who is ashamed because of some seemingly terrible failures


Whose appointment has been terminated


Who cries secretly every night asking yourself "Why Me"


Who is heartbroken as a result of failed relationship


Who is feeling unsure of herself because you have been terribly abused and assaulted 


Who has been called different names because you refused to conform to a certain way of life completely different from who you are


Who has  no job


Who is in serious debts


Who is going through one challenge or the other


You are more than all these life challenging circumstances. Whatever you are going through right now does not determine who you truly are if only you believe that you are more than! If you can look inside of you, you will definitely find you. GOD has given each and every one of us the ability to overcome, to come out victoriously. That is why you need not judge someone because the person  looks good and is doing well- you can never know the battle he or she had fought and won. So, everything you are and desire to be can be yours if you see yourself more than all those negative and challenging situations. You cannot let your life be ruled by something you know that GOD has given you victory over. Be brave and say ENOUGH is ENOUGH to mistakes, failures and abuse and those feelings that would want to keep you down. Your success is known by battles you have fought and won! 

Friday, 19 December 2014

IRON SHARPENS IRON






A Bulgarian proverb confirms it "if you find yourself taking two steps forward and one step backwards, you have invariably mixed up association in your life"



Most of the trail blazing achievements and opportunities people have embraced are traceable to the meaningful contacts they made that eventually turned out very yielding, causing them to experience untold increase and fulfilment...in the same vain, it is rather obvious that evil communication corrupts good manners. 



It is not enough to come from a family that is known for high level moral rectitude, it is important you define the association that will strengthen the values you were schooled with. Indeed iron sharpens iron and so does a friend sharpens the countenance of his friend. 

Think about what will happen if you choose to sharpen an iron with a wood...I have thought about it and I imagined two things will happen; the iron will get blunt and the wood will be damaged. It only becomes a fruitful venture when you have a clear-cut definition of your purpose in life and begin to attract the very key personalities that sharpen you even as you compliment them. 



It is commonly said "show me your friend and I will tell you who you are". It is easy for me to tell you who you are by interfacing with your friends...yes...because they have rubbed-off on you, they have influenced you even without your consent or awareness. 



Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. You are sharpened by irons, you are improved by the persons you associate with, you are also short-changed by the same choice of association; it is all a matter of choice. Choose the partner, friends, carefully. Ones that will lift your soul and not bring you down and make you forget who you truly are! It is written, "Oil and Perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel", Proverbs 27:9

REDEFINING YOUR STANDARDS




"Experience is not what happens to you; it is what you do with what happens to you."  Aldous Huxley


A baby Elephant is trained at birth to be confined to a very small space. Its trainer will tie its legs to a rope planted deep in the ground. Initially, the Elephant will try to break the rope, the rope is too strong and after series of trial at different times to free but situation proves difficult, the Elephant learns to live within the area determined by the length of the rope. It is surprising to know that when the Elephant grows into a 5 ton colossus that could easily break the rope, it doesn't even try because at birth, it could not and has consolidated that myth that reduces its capacity to explore a large land mass. In this way, the largest Elephant can be confined to the puniest little rope. This confinement obviously was born of prevailing circumstances "beyond" the control of the subject in focus. The subject in focus here is "You" because on a daily bases we are faced with circumstances and situations that either tend to overpower us or we do not have control over them and "cannot do anything about them as we say most of the time". There is no problem or situation that is strange to mankind as we have the ability to make the right choices even in the midst of prevailing circumstances that seem dominate the atmosphere. But the questions are these; Do you have a choice to make in all these? Are there other options to choose from apart from the one that dampens your core values as an individual or organization? Have you thought of the futuristic impact of that choice? Even if you can live with it, is it in sync with the values you expect folks around you to manifest?
It is however amazing to know how people have become so comfortable with the average life when they have the capacity to live and experience untold fulfillment in every area of life.



This ability is given to every person and is backed up with enough human, intellectual, spiritual, psychological, emotional, abilities to explore the world, touch lives significantly and experience fulfillment.
The essence of life is to live irresistibly, love irresistibly, lead irresistibly, and experience complete satisfaction while fulfilling destiny. The life of joy and victory has never been determined by circumstances, but by complete awareness of available internal and external resources made available by the Supreme Being, discovering your niche in one of the pillars of influence and having the courage to become solution provider. The tendency to desire high level successful in life is seen in so many people, but the courage to consistently follow through the principles that give birth to this untold success is not easily imbibed.  So many questions have been asked as to why in every society, the rich will always have the companies and every other person working for them, why there are no equal opportunities given to everyone, why people do not see the same things, and why people produce different levels of excellence. In my discovery, I found out that this disparity in opportunities and results is simply an effect of personal choice. This choice however is born of a re-oriented mindset, attitude and choice of personal life perception. This brings us to one of the most significant topics in this life re engineering material.



Lelook at some traits common among successful people. The essence of this mental exercise is to be aware of traits that have produced outstanding results. In as much as these traits are unique and born out of nice combination of discipline that makes them uncommon, they are harness-able at the same time depending on how relevant you will see them and also how they will influence you.


Thursday, 18 December 2014

LETTING YOUR LIGHT SHINE



There is an adage that says " If you are not a thief, do not walk like one".

What a simple way of telling us to be as transparent as possible. 


This is so true especially in this present dispensation where folks have become susceptible to judge the "next door neighbour" or simply wear an  impression. 

It's really surprising that someone that barely has knowledge of either your persona or character make up, chooses to feed his ego by nursing a bad impression about you...


These days, People are not patient enough to take their time and make a proper assessment about someone, before the echoes of judgement resounds.  That is the reason you should always portray the image of who you truly are...that doesn't mean your topic wouldn't be raised every now and then, but in the midst of that, the truth about your core attitude can never be watered down by any negative impression.


A lot of people have lost great opportunities as a result of appearing to be who they are not... Camouflage... If you are a good person,  there is no need for all the hanky panky games- just show your real self. Do not try to put yourself to test- what it means is that you are putting your life on the line and you are making a joke of your life. When you take yourself seriously, people will take you seriously. The Bible says "let your life so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your FATHER who is in heaven. So you see, if you are not a bad person , do not make an appearance of a bad person,  you are only tarnishing your image- and the unfortunate part is that usually you do not always get another chance. 

Make very good use of every opportunity you get to show case your GOD-GIVEN abilities and nature. Sometime ago, as a copper, I met someone whom I never knew I made a great first impression the first time, which later got me a very good job. 


Will you let your light shine today?

ARE YOU READY?




To one person the world is in a desolate state, dull, void without possibilities of victories, to another the same world looks rich, full of meaning and endless possibilities. In the words of J. Oswald Sanders, "Eyes that look are common, eyes that see are rare". Very striking indeed. It's one thing to wake up and set out for the day, it's another thing to position yourself rightly to receive which entails being sensitive to the opportunities that come your pathway. 



How you position yourself to receive makes all the difference...you can never see the sunrise by looking to the west, the choice is up to you. If you look at life the wrong way and interpret every bit of your experiences the wrong way, there is a cause for alarm. It is the same way a one thousand naira note can be too big when it goes into the church purse and too small when it goes for groceries...it is all a matter of choices and perception. 



What you see depends mainly on what you look for. Some people can complain that roses have thorns, instead be thankful that thorns have roses. 



Position yourself to receive and not resist. How you see things on the outside is a reflection of how you are right inside because you cannot give what you don't have. 



Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude towards it, for that determines our success or failure...Norman Vincent Peale.
You have to change your approach and paradigm so that the possibilities around you can find expression because you are sensitive...not just to look but to see beyond what your optical nerves can produce. 


Straight from my heart...Aspire!!!

Wednesday, 17 December 2014

HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW HIM?




Rose:  I feel I am having the best time of my life.


Diane: Really? How so?


Rose: My fiancé, he is such a lovely man. He makes me happy.


Diane: I knowww dear. It is so obvious that you are happy.


Rose: I really thank GOD.


Diane: Don't get me wrong  my friend, but can i ask you some things?


Rose: (with excitement) Go ahead.


Diane: How well do you know this guy?


Rose: I know him very well. I know his family. I know where he lives and work. He does not hide anything from me. We are so compatible. 


Diane: Ok dear. I am happy you said all these with confidence. How about his christian life?


Rose: mmmmm, he is not really into the church things, but he is a very wonderful man. So harmless. I so love his person.


Diane: But you are a very good christian. You feel that is not a minus on his resume? Because if he is not a christian  or not into the church things as you put it, will you cope with such a man who sees the world differently from the way you see yours?


Rose: (hissed) Don't worry my friend, my fiancé is not a difficult man, i will introduce him to church when we get married.


Diane: Why not now?


Rose: Ha! I do not want him to feel I am a fanatic and moreover, he has a negative notion about men of GOD. So I don't want to rush him. I am taking my time. 


Diane: Really, Rose? 


Rose: Yes, really. 


Diane: Ok. I can see you are very sure about your stand. I have little or nothing to say. But one more question, should i?


Rose: Well, go ahead. But  I am beginning to get irritated.


Diane: I care about you my friend. I do not want you to be deceived. I have heard stories my friend. All that glitters is not gold.


Rose: What is your question, I want to go home now? (feeling irritated).


Diane: How about his phone? Do you have access to his phone?


Rose: You are very funny and naive, Diane. What am I doing with his phone? He has his privacy and I have mine. Why should I pry into his privacy? It is childish. No, I do not have access to his phone. Moreover, his phones has a password and I respect that.


Diane: Unbelievable! Like seriously? (surprised). Can you hear yourself Rose? What has come over you? I do not believe you. What? You do not have access to his phone and it does not bother you?


Rose: Why should it? I am mature. We both have an understanding.


Diane: (Laughing mockingly). Wow! You need to slow down my friend. This is ridiculous. You cannot possibly be serious about getting married to this guy. At least not yet. How sure are you that this guy is all sincere and truthful to you? Why is his phone passworded? And why do you not have access to his phone? How do you know what he is up to? Pleaaaase my friend, slow down. If you can listen to me, do not marry this guy yet until you have found out some basic facts about him.



Rose: There is nothing to worry about. I have it all under control.


Diane: Do not say I did not warn you.


Rose: Bye Diane. Enough please. 


Diane: Alright dear. I wish you the best.


Rose:  Now you are talking. Thank youuuu.


Six Months Later After the wedding


Diane: Woooowwwww. Is that you Rose? So good to see you. ( So excited)


Rose: Diane (look of guilt), how are you?


Diane: Are you ok, Rose? You do not look happy. What is the matter?


Rose: (Trying to cover up her emotion) Oh, no problems at all. I am just surprised to see you. You look well. I am sorry I have not been picking your calls, it was not deliberate. Are you married now?


Diane: Yes I am, that was why I was calling you, but you never picked my calls and you never returned them. I thought I was being a bother to you, so I decided to let you be. 


Rose: I am so sorry (eyes filled with tears). It has not been easy for me. I am in hell.


Diane: I dont understand. What do you mean you are in hell?


Rose: I married a devil. Infact, he is worse than the devil.


Diane: You cannot be serious. You mean your husband? The same man you said all those good things about?


Rose: (Crying bitterly). Yes, the same man.


Diane: ( angry and disappointed). Oh my GOD! Rose!!!! Why??? (tears rushing down). I do not want to say I told you. I do not want to add to the pain you are already in. I am so shocked. What???



Rose: (Still crying bitterly). Just go ahead and blame me Diane. Blame me. Maybe that is what I need. I brought this upon myself. This man is a devil, Diane. He bits me at any little provocation. He is a womaniser, a drunk, a smoker. He is the devil himself. I am so gone. I have had two miscarriages as a result of his beatings. Please Diane help me. He has stopped me from visiting my family or seeing any of my friends. The whole problem started when I told him that I was no longer comfortable with the way he keeps his phones away from me.


Diane: (mouth wide open in shock)!



Shocking Right? Please dear Ladies, how well do you know this man? Your future and destiny is determined by the man you spend the rest of your life with. Do not let what happened to Rose to be your fate. You have a lot of work to do by finding out who he truly is. These "things" are not hidden, just that most times we chose to turn a blind eye, claiming not to know.

TRIED AND TASTED


There is no inventor or manufacturer of a product who will not first of all try that product before releasing it to the market for consumers to buy. For example, when Daimler brings out a new model of Mercedes Benz car, they take it to their testing bay for the car to go through several kinds of tests. They subject it to huge impact from external forces, thet turn it upside down,  they drive it in all kinds off simulated weather, and they drive it up and down slopes at top speeds: they perform very imaginable and unimaginable test on it...why? They want to make sure that it works before they release it to the public, they want to make sure that the product they are yet to release will stand the test of time irrespective of exposure to harsh realities. 



Similarly, when a new kind of medicine which is meant to cure some kind of sickness or disease is invented, it is first tried on rats, cats, hamsters etc, and then they eventually administer it to human beings under very close supervision, and when the responses are as expected, the medicine is open for the public to access. 

If you take the medicine before it has been tried, there is a possibility that it could fail and therefore become very harmful to the recipient.


Even God, in the midst of darkness said "let there be light" and light came...he did a test run on the things he created before granting man access to the great possibilities of life. 


The God-kind of faith you are developing in your life today has been tried, tested, and passed all the possible tests your mind can fathom. Remember, before the light was released to mankind, it was tested and it worked...Noah used it and it worked, Abraham used it and it worked, Isaac also used it, and it did prove consistent, Jacob, Joseph, Rahab, Samson, David...they all used it and it worked for all of them. 


What are you waiting for? The mustard seed faith you were given should have gained the weight of an orange by now...



Use your faith, it has been tested and has proven consistent, reliable, and unshakeable.


Hello...start winning, start enjoying the victory, start celebrating!!!

WORDS MAKE WAY




The course of any life depends on the right or wrong use of words. Words create for us the path we take in life. Rich or poor, great or small, success or failure, our words are custodian of our everyday life. Life or death comes from the kind of words that we speak. There will be no need for suffering, poverty will be unnecessary if men everywhere will use the power of words to their advantage. No contrary winds and storms of life however great are strong enough to conquer the man who has the right words in his amour.




We live in a world sculpted and created by the spoken words of God. We can only make our lives, change our environments and the things we want to see by the words we constantly speak. Great minds the world over rule by words. The right words puts us in charge over the circumstances of life as the wrong words imprison us and take us captives by the little events of day-to-day existence. We compel men, circumstances and events to submit to us if we use the right words.




Joseph became the prince among his brothers because he spoke the right words. E. W. Kenyon submits for further evidence that; “the secret of advancement in life lies in the ability to say the right kind of words.” Dreams and visions die because the right words are not planted. Nothing is accomplished in some lives as a result of fear of the unknown. People don’t get anything out of life because they say nothing. Ideas never sprout because of mere impediments and adverse confrontations. Since they are not watered with the right words, they fade as soon as they spring up.




In spite of the oppositions from his family members, Joseph became prime minister in a foreign land without a god father or any political structure. Though he was hated for his too many dreams yet he never stopped talking the future he saw every night he went to sleep on wooden beds. He just kept muttering to himself day and night: “My dad, my mum and my brothers will bow down to me someday. 



Culled from allthewordsthatinspire@gmail.com



Tuesday, 16 December 2014

THE ROOTS CREATE THE FRUITS



Imagine a tree. Let's suppose this tree represents the tree of life. On this tree there are fruits. In life, our fruits are called our results. So we look at the fruits (our results) and we don't like them; they aren't enough of them, they're too small, or they don't taste good. 


So what do we tend to do? Most of us put even more attention and focus on the fruits, our results, but what is it that actually creates those particular fruits? It's the seed and the roots that create those fruits. 


It's what's under the ground that creates what's above the ground. It's what's invisible that creates what's visible. So what does that mean? In simple terms, it means that if you want to change the fruits, that is the results you produce and traits you manifest, you will first have to change the roots. It you want to change the visible, you must first change the invisible.


The changes we expect to see in our lives will not emerge until we begin to take gradual steps that will eventually produce the results that we seek.

Excerpts from "Secrets of the Millionaire Mind...T. Harv Eker

Monday, 15 December 2014

LET US SHOW SOME LOVE




Love is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person. To love someone is not just a feeling whereby, when you feel low you love less or you love more when you are happy and excited and satisfied. Love is a decision, a judgement and a promise. 


Love is active not dormant. Love is shown, given, shared. There is no love without giving. No wonder the bible says "for GOD so loved the world that HE gave! You go out of your way to meet someone's need, knowing that the person is in need without asking you. Money is not all the need one could ask for. It could be your lovely presence, your listening ear, your affection, your time, your good attitude, your sensitivity, your understanding and more. So it marvels me when I hear some people say "I do not have anything to give". 


It is not all the time that one would be free enough to ask you for a help , but it takes love to be sensitive to decipher that your help is needed. 


In the case of married couples, you do not need to wait for your husband/wife to ask for your assistance, we need to be sensitive enough to understand what our partners need and go ahead and give it without one asking for it. That is love. 

So I urge us to take advantage of this season of love to appreciate each other, give love, show love, share love. That is the essence of this Christmas season. Remember, GOD gave us HIS only son without us asking HIM. That is love!

HOW MANY MEN KNOW THIS TRUTH?



Happy Birthday to the hardest working woman I know. My life source, the love of my life, my heartbeat… http://t.co/aUoHMN51wa


How many men truly know that their wives are their life source? Food for thought. 


Well done Darey Art Alade for your understanding of this mystery.  No wonder your life has no controversy.  A beautiful happy birthday to your lovely wife. 

I HAVE LEARNT


STILL ON REFLECTION! 



I have learnt not to overlook certain seemenly little things. They appear little and some of them are insignificant either because they have become acceptable trends or people are not aware of them. Although some of these trends have become culturally acceptable, it doesn't negate the fact that they are nonsikitor and against ethical standards of an egalitarian society.


In my relationship with people, I have learnt...

I have learnt how to listen as much as have learnt how to hear.



I have learnt to pay close attention to detail because I found out that it reveals my level of commitment and zest.  



I have learnt how to express myself and communicate in a simple and clear manner even when I am being misunderstood,  misinterpreted, and misjudged.



I have not only learnt how to acknowledge my wrongs but have embraced a teachable spirit that humbles me to learn from the best.



I have learnt how to say "am sorry"...In learning this, I have found out that apologising doesn't necessarily mean you are wrong,  it reveals your level of maturity, leadership, and your effort to live in peace with people just as the Bible instructs.



I have learnt to show love with out any carnal undertone.



I have learnt how to respond...even to a cruel boss.



I have learnt fundamental skills that  naturally bring me in the circle of influence. 



I have learnt to believe in the abilities of people and help them make the right decisions that are critical to their success. 

 

I have learnt not to trample on people with my position.



I have learnt to celebrate both simple and outstanding performances of people.



I have learnt to be sensitive to the needs of people.



I have learnt how to say " NO". Saying NO most times will save you from  making terrible mistakes. Learn the areas where it is necessary for you to say NO no matter what. 



I have learnt not to discuss my boss, my spiritual leaders and mentors even when I feel I haven't received a fair bit.  



I have learnt, I have learnt, and I have learnt...



But then, I have learnt how to carry myself with confidence such that even as I interface with various personalities,  I should be the first to give whatever virtue I desire to receive. It could be a smile, a warm reception, a comment that strengthens confidence, an applause,  a helping hand, an advice, or a hug.


In  all of these, I have learnt to live in peace with all men...


Let us pause and reflect!!!

YOUR CHILD AND YOU


Our job as parents is to train up our children well, give them the best, provide the right environment and also nourish them. Let us know that children are like seeds that came in a packet without label,  and as such we parents need to plant them, water them, prune them, feed them with the right nutrients and ensure  they grow well without them getting chocked with weeds and thorns.  The love we have for our children is unconditional.  That is love without any string attached. Love that came from no efforts of theirs at all. We even loved them before we set our eyes on them. As parents,  let us  


Appreciate our children no matter their weakness,  which could be a sign of strength at the long run. 


Help them overcome these weaknesses by helping them and showing them love.  

Make your child feel understood and accepted. Do not always be in a hurry to pass judgement on your child. Always give your child room to explain him/herself. By so doing, you will gain  the trust of your child.  

Reconnect,  emphasise and as well address your child's behaviour. 

Manage your anger. It takes daily practice though, but very rewarding. 

Sunday, 14 December 2014

REFLECTIONS




1. Have you ever had someone believe in you in ways that you did not even believe in yourself? How did it make you feel? Did you behave differently as a result of their respect?



2. Are there people you know who benefit from added respect? What can you do to enhance their self-esteem and release their potential? What "cows" can you offer them as a symbol of your respect?



3. Like Jonny Lingo, most everyone has been the victim of undue gossip- a clear violation of the principle of respect. When you hear gossip in the social circle, do you pass it on or smother it as its roots?



4. For the first time at sixteen, Dudley felt part of a group. Are there people you know who would benefit from being part of your circle?



5. When was the last time you celebrated a neighbours difference? 



6. When last did you go out of your way to meet someone's need, financially in your local church, at work, within your family, at the charity homes etc?